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Tips on How to Get Along with the In-Laws

Whether you like it or not, your partner and their family are a package deal. Part of getting married is loving your spouse while learning to accept your spouse’s family. Though some people have all the luck and seem to get along with their in-laws right away, other people just can’t seem to do it. Obviously, you can’t get along with them if you simply choose to avoid them. After all, you wouldn’t want to hurt your spouse. So, if you’re trying to find ways to get along with your in-laws, why not consider the following things.

Be Understanding

One good way to try to get along with your in-laws would be to try to understand them. Since you are just pretty new to the family, there are definitely some things that you may not get about them. If something is said or done that confuses you, maybe it’s best to just try to tell yourself that maybe you just don’t understand them completely. Do your best to not see everything in a bad light. Give them the benefit of the doubt and see what they really mean by what they say or do.

Ask Your Spouse for Help

The best person to approach would be your spouse. They are your spouse’s family after all. If there’s just something you don’t understand or need help with, telling your spouse would help because they can at least fill you in or clarify whatever it is you’re having trouble with. Your spouse could also tell you what you could to do make things better and help with your trying to get along with them. They’ll definitely appreciate the effort too.

Pick the Right Conversation Topics

If you’re feeling brave enough and want to try to break the ice, make sure you don’t do anything that’ll be off-putting. So, yes, that means you should avoid conversation topics that are a little controversial. Whether it’s politics or beliefs, if you don’t know them that well and are still trying to get along with them, it would be better to just avoid those conversations altogether.

Be Honest, But Reasonable

Even though you’ll have to do your part to understand them, you’ll also have to be honest with them. If they say or do something that might’ve struck a nerve, find a way to let them know that you didn’t really appreciate it. Just remember to do it in a polite and appropriate way. If you get your feelings hurt and you just end up throwing a tantrum about it, it might not really do you any good.

You can’t choose your family and you most definitely can’t choose your in-laws. What matters most is that you make the effort to respect them and get along with them. And even if you don’t, you’ll at least make your spouse happier.

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Mr. Hutton is a Divorce and Custody Lawyer based out of Round Rock, TX. His background is with child psychology at Arizona State University where he received a B.S. in 2006, and he continued this by working with the Children’s Right’s Clinic at the University of Texas School of Law where he received his J.D. in 2009. Throughout his practice, he has been a strong proponent of utilizing modern technology to improve his practice and the representation of his clients. He currently is the technology chair of CAFA of Travis County and is committed to improving and modernizing the practice of law in Texas. If you have any questions you can contact him at

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